I have self-esteem issues. Frequently, I rely on other people's thoughts and opinions of me to determine my self-worth. How do I get put a stop to that way of thinking and become capable of determining my self-worth on my own? Any tips and advise would be greatly appreciated.

I read somewhere that developing self-esteem requires doing esteemable acts. Or to put it another way - you can't thinking your way into feeling beeter about yourself, you have to act your way into it. I've had to do a lot of work on personal growth in the last 10 years or so and I'd say those statements have certainly been true for me.

There are probably thousands of self-help workbooks or therapeutic or 12 Step programs that you could use. Really it doesn't matter what you pick - but pick something - and as long as you follow through and do the work suggested you will make progress - and part of that personal development will be growing self-esteem. The only important point is that whatever you choose to do - do it! Don't just read a workbook - write the exercises or whatever too!

One place you could start is Melody Beattie's Co-dependent No More

Good luck!

Filed under: Self help